I’m still trying to use my materials, but I will say that there are some cheap used copies of the book at amazon, and here is a link. http://www.amazon.com/gp/offer-listing/0974448001/ref=sr_1_olp_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1238530903&sr=1-1

I guess I’ll give an update to my new year’s resolution. Things have improved with me quite a bit. I found the book to be the best resource. After a few months of following the book religiously, things have definitely improved. I suspect that you still have access to the phone calls, and I’d encourage you to listen to them. The CD’s are pretty much the same thing as the phone calls, though there are plenty more hours of CD’s.

Mort tends to repeat himself quite a bit. He does this intentionally, because he is trying to drive the points home, and make sure they’re not forgotten. I will say, since things have gone better, I don’t follow the plan as closely as I should–I’ve cut back on talk charges and touch charges, and this is probably a bad thing. But on the other hand, I’ve continued to do more service for my wife, which she seems to respond to better anyway.

For example, we just had a baby boy, and he’s been really fussy over the last week. Last night, my wife went to bed around 9:30, while I stayed up holding the baby until about 11. I put him in the crib, and he stayed there for only about 5 min, before fussing again. I picked him up, and slept holding him on my chest on the couch (actually it was more of resting with my eyes closed) until about 1 AM. At that time, I knew he’d been about 5 hours without eating, and knew he was hungry, so I had to wake my wife for that.

Anyway, this morning my wife thanked me for letting her sleep, and these little acts (which I didn’t do for my other children) are really helping. As I look back, I should have been doing them all along, but I really think the book was the most effective piece of the puzzle for me.

I’m trying to do the workbook with my wife now, but she really thinks the workbook is a waste of time. Much of what he says is repeated. On the other hand, when I purchased the whole set, having the phone calls and CD’s made me feel like I was doing something, so it was a bit of a salve to my relationship. Mort’s plan is intentionally slow, which can be frustrating, and having the CD’s and phone calls (which are really more like CD’s over the phone–there is little interaction) does give you the sense that you’re doing something, even though it feels like you’re not doing very much.

So, I’m not quite prepared to sell my stuff yet, but perhaps there is someone else who can help you out.

I signed up for the program. But the post office LOST my package. It was mis-delivered and there is no trace of it. I talked with Adina, Mort’s Assistant, but there is basically nothing that they can do to help because the package is marked as ‘delivered” from their end. If I want to get the materials, they want me to pay $69.95 to order a new set of the CDs, books and everything!

I am extremely disappointed by this customer service, I’m also not eligible for the refund because I never received the books to return them. Money is tight, and I just spent $400 on this program and I haven’t even got the materials to make it work. I’ve even offered to pay for postage for a new set of materials (using UPS shipping this time!), but I have to BUY the materials again, which seems just a bit ridiculous to me. I understand that they have policies and procedures, but yes, the post office DOES occassionally lose packages, no? Nobody’s perfect! I’d hope that MarriageMax is committed to good customer service and could offer to help out with this.

If someone could be of assistance, I’d greatly appreciate it.

Email me at mormon heretic at gmail dot com, and I may be able to help you out some.

I’m glad the talk charge is working for you. I always found that hard to implement, because my wife hasn’t always been receptive to me calling for no reason. My wife is not a “cuddly” person either, so the touch charge stuff has been hard for me too, but I’m finding that as our relationship improves, the touch charges are a little easier, though I probably don’t do them as much as the book tells me to.

Calling just to touch base and connect (keeping away from logistical talk as much as possible). It has felt good to talk on the phone even if it is for just 60 seconds with neither of us exhibiting anger or frustration.

We really don’t talk anymore at home. So any positive connection is a step in the right direction.

Mort lays it out there and is explaining what helped him and his wife get back from the brink of divorce.

It’s about purposefuly making conscious habits of what we did subconcsiouly at the beginning of the relationship that created those amazing years of connection. So that we can concsiously “make love” and that connection and brightness and lens of joy that comes along with it for the rest of our lives.

Yes, we both marry the persona we meet and the personas we change into over the years. But it is the knower/watcher/observer/breath of life spirit/our true self/our oversoul that never changes that we have ultimately connected to and long to remain connected to for eternity. That connection can be made for the rest of our lives if we consciously take action to “make love” everyday.

We married later in life. I was 32 and she was 30. That was in 2000. We now have a doughter who is 5 and a son who is 2.

I am in agreement with Mort’s worldview and philosophy. Unfortunately, I had become so focused on the financial security that I forgot to keep connecting emotionally with my wife. (THAT WAS BIG!!! LOSING THAT CONNECTION!!)

Moving from 2 incomes to 1 was very hard on me emotionally. I withdrew rather than reached out to my wife emotionally.

What would you say is the main difference between the exercises in the workbook vs the book?

Is one of the main Lone Ranger points that you plug away at the 14 weeks paperbook plan and model the behavior anyway so as to positively connect or at least do your part to connect emotionally?

I do not have the money for the Lone Ranger teleconferences that start on Monday, so I am trying to understand what more I would need to see and do in addition to the paperback that I have to “make love” and get the results I am after for our marriage.

Fertel often repeats himself, but he does that for a reason. He is trying to drill some of his points into you because they are important.

The teleconferences and CD’s are quite similar. I found the teleconferences to be a little disappointing, because there is no interaction, so it’s like listening to a CD over the phone, which isn’t very fun. He does have 3 Q&A sessions, but I was only able to listen to the first one live. I would have preferred to participate in more of the Q&A sessions, but my schedule wouldn’t allow it.

I started the workbook, and tried doing the exercises in order, but the workbook is so bulky that I finally just decided to read the book on my own. If you follow the workbook exactly, he gives assignments to read chapters in a certain order, but this just didn’t fit my style very well. The book was easier to carry around, and I didn’t need a CD player. I would read chapters from the book when I had time, and I really loved the book.

He gives exercises in the book and the workbook. After attending the Q&A session, I realized that many of the people who do this course, have marriages in much more serious jeopardy than I do. Most are separated, dealing with affairs, and fighting like crazy. I often felt like my problems were minor comparatively speaking. For example, the date night idea was pretty easy to do. I’ve had 1 successful date; our babysitter is sick this week, so I’m not sure if tonight is going to be successful, but we’ll see. However, with other couples who are separated and not speaking, the date night is going to be enormously difficult. (Fertel says if you’re not getting rejected, you’re not trying hard enough.)

One other thing I have tried to do is to drop whatever I am doing when my wife starts talking to me. In the past, if I was reading the paper/book/internet, my wife just starts talking to me, and I usually heard only about 1/4th of what she was saying. I can remember just a few weeks ago, she was upset because I didn’t hear what she said, and I responded to her saying, “can’t you see that I’m reading?!”

Fertel says that a man should drop anything, even if you’re in a business meeting. He says, “Do you take all calls at work, not matter what? You should.” He also says that you should do a romantic getaway twice a year, without children. And he even says that if you can’t get time off work, take unpaid time, or get a new job.

So, I’ve made a conscious effort to put down whatever I do when she starts talking. I have definitely seen an improvement in our relationship, and the date night last week was a big hit. She told me we didn’t have to do date night every week, but I am insisting that we do. Perhaps we won’t go out tonight, but I am hoping that our babysitter will feel better tomorrow.

I think that the most bang for the buck is to buy the book, but if you are already contemplating a divorce, or separated, perhaps the more intense Lone Ranger Track might be a good idea. Fertel says he tries to appeal to all senses, which is why he wants to provide reading, writing, and listening exercises. Certainly, there are many other exercises in the workbook than the book alone.